In the first age, in the first battle, when the shadows first lengthened, one stood. He chose the path of perpetual torment. In his ravenous hatred, he found no peace, and with boiling blood, he scoured the umbral plains, seeking vengeance against the dark lords who had wronged him. And those that tasted the bite of his sword named him

SpongeBob SquarePants! SpongeBob SquarePants! SpongeBob SquarePants! SpongeBob SquarePAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I whip my hair back and forth!
I whip my hair back and forth!
I whip my hair back and forth!
I whip my hair back and forth!

Crawling in my skin
These wounds, they will not heal
Fear is how I fall
Confusing what is real

His palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy
There's vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti
He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready
To drop bombs, but he keeps on forgettin'
What he wrote down, the whole crowd goes so loud
He opens his mouth, but the words won't come out
He's chokin', how, everybody's jokin' now
The clocks run out, times up, over, blaow!
Snap back to reality, oh there goes gravity
Oh, there goes Rabbit, he choked
He's so mad, but he won't give up that easy? No
He won't have it, he knows his whole back city's ropes
It don't matter, he's dope, he knows that, but he's broke
He's so stacked that he knows, when he goes back to his mobile home, that's when its
Back to the lab again yo, this whole rhapsody
He better go capture this moment and hope it don't pass him

Creeper, oh man
So we back in the mine, got our pickaxe swinging from side to side,
Side, side to side
This task a grueling one, hope to find some diamonds tonight, night, night
Diamonds tonight
Heads up, you hear a sound, turn around and look up, total shock fills your body,
Oh no it's you again,
I could never forget those eyes, eyes, eyes,
Eyes, eyes, eyes
'Cause baby tonight

AHOY SPONGEBOB! I AM
(Entombed in the cursed sarcophagus evermore in silent suffering.)
ARGH ARGH ARGH ARGH ARGH!